In which I complete the checklist … or Yet more rambles on healing, nurturing and the like – Part Three

Having set myself some homework in my last post, I duly completed the task. Going public with this was clearly the kick in the a$$ that I needed: I am nothing if not reliable and conscientious – to the point of being nauseating.

You’ll recall that the book I was reading has five domains in which to assess your satisfaction with life, and your balance in the different domains. It gives you multiple questions and then a score out of 50 for each domain. It says a score above 40 means that area of life is probably working pretty well for you. Anything less than 30 warrants some attention pretty fast. Here are my scores:

                Work:                    26/50

                Health:                 19/50

                Mind:                    29/50

                Leisure:               14/50

                Social Support: 13/50

So much for anything above 40, eh? So much for the balance that those of us born under a certain sign crave, eh?

Sure, I know little quizzes like this are limited in their utility. The point for me is not the score itself, but what this represents in terms of my satisfaction with these parts of my life. For me this was a nice way to crystallise things I already knew but hadn’t necessarily been able to articulate.

I think what this says is that I’m doing a pretty good job of stimulating my mind. Between work and play, and therapy of course, my mind is reasonably stimulated. It also says there are elements of my work that are satisfying me. That’s true, though after a recent series of posts, we all know which things need to change there!

The areas I obviously need to focus on are:

  • health
  • leisure, and
  • social support.

I knew this, though I couldn’t necessarily have named it this way.

As I said last time, getting more balance is another matter. I’m not really sure where to start. Perhaps health is an obvious one given I’m now afflicted with a chest infection and popping antibiotics and cortisone like Tic Tacs. Perhaps when the doctor says “rest” she means I shouldn’t sit up half the night writing blog posts or playing stoopid farm games on social networking sites? LOL

My therapist thinks getting more balance is merely a matter of identifying things I’d like to do, and then booking a slot in a course, or whatever, but there’s more to it than that for me.

I know there are some things I’d like to do – exercise more, for one thing. That’s ok – I can do that, when I’m not sick (though at the moment I feel like every time I start to exercise again, I get sick again… which takes me back to the health aspect again … *Sigh*).

Another thing I’d like to do is something creative. For a while I’ve wanted to get back into drawing, or take a class in photography or even painting. But doing any of these things means I have to face a whole bunch of other fears and insecurities and anxieties.

Odd as this sounds, I’m reminded of a scene from The West Wing. It’s the final season, penultimate episode, in which CJ is contemplating life after the White House. She has job offers coming out of her ears and is questioning her newly consummated relationship with Danny. At the end of the ep she tells him she isn’t sure she can do a relationship:

CJ: “This is who I am. I’m good at my job. I’m good at working….”

Danny: “We’ll figure it out. All of it…. I want you to do what you want…. I just want you to talk to me about it. I want us to talk about what it’ll mean and how we’ll make it work…. I want us to talk….”

CJ: “Franklin Hollis wants me to take $10 billion and go and fix the world.”

Danny: “That sounds like fun. Does that sound like fun to you?” She nods. “Do you want to work at the White House?” She shakes her head.

Obviously I’m no CJ, but there are some parallels here for me. Maybe she should join me in my therapist’s office? Or may be she too needs a little book Kate recommended – on which I shall pontificate next time… 😉


5 thoughts on “In which I complete the checklist … or Yet more rambles on healing, nurturing and the like – Part Three

  1. OK, the most important question first – Farmville or FarmTown? Yup, as you can see I can cut right through all that good healing talk and get down to the irrelevant… Mind you, in FarmTown you can visit other farms, does that count as socialising?

    I won’t try to offer any advice on any of the aspects that you’ve identified as wanting to work on. I need to work on all of them as well, so am probably on the same level as you when it comes to needing to look at them. But, I wonder whether you can use the coping mechanisms you have around being reliable and conscientious to help you along the way? Will signing up for a community course in the arts “make” you turn up through the need to keep appointments?

    Take care…

  2. @ CG – LOL, thanks for the laugh. I’m a confirmed Farmville addict. I can visit neighbours, so I think that’s definitely socialising. LOL

    I would love any advice you can offer about creating balance. You have such a wonderful gift for creativity, and seem to pursue that regularly. Well done.

    Alas, no amount of conscientiousness or reliability will make me turn up to a class in which I fear being laughed at or found a failure. 😦

    Hugs to you.

  3. Hi Kerro,

    Great post. Great progress. How about satarting small with the creativity stuff? There are a few art therapy books, and the whole point to that is the process not how good the end product looks. I do some of those and quite frankly I love how the end products look, plus they are extra healing to look at still.

    About six years ago I started trying to come up with some more creative ideas to do. What I found was some great kids arts and crafts books. I will tell you a few titles that I love alot, if you are interested. You can stay at home. And it shouldn’t bring up as much stuff, though sometimes it might.

    Good and healing thoughts to you.


  4. Thanks for the suggestions, Kate. I actually have a number of creative projects either half done or in the pipeline… just can’t seem to organise myself to do them. And, partly, I think I need to do things that aren’t home alone. But thanks, good ideas.

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