Messing with my mind

As you know, my mother is staying with me this week to help me settle into my new home. As a result, my father is in respite care for a week. My mother rang him this morning and, for once – for the first time in a long time – I said I’d speak to him. Voluntarily. Weird.

Then the ol’ **** said he didn’t want to speak to me. I was almost disappointed. I know I shouldn’t be – I should have stopped expecting anything from him a loooooong time ago. Somehow there’s still a little kid inside with some sort of crazy hope for something. I don’t know why, it’s all terribly irrational, but even knowing that doesn’t really help much… still confusing and brain fuddling as all heck.


2 thoughts on “Messing with my mind

  1. Kerro,
    It’s hope. I understand where you’re coming from. My dad and I haven’t spoken in years. Yet someday I hope that we’ll talk. I don’t know why…I’m so pissed at him.

    But in the end….he’s my dad. A shitty dad, buy my dad.


  2. Hi Kerro,

    I’m sorry. Tt seems to me he said no for a reason, to hurt you again. I think he sucks.

    Good and healing thoughts to you.


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