This week my therapist talked about how far I’ve come in such a short space of time. This always freaks me out, because I don’t necessarily see the progress – not the progress I expected, anyway. I do agree that I have come a long way and dealt with a lot of stuff in a few short months, even if I’m still a long way from being where I want to be.
My therapist asked me to think about the things that once seemed insurmountable. The things I didn’t think I’d ever do. Not tomorrow; not in a MILLION tomorrows.
- Seeing my therapist in the very beginning.
- Disclosing all that heinous shyt from the past to her.
- Disclosing heinous shyt to friends.
- Telling my mother I’m seeing a therapist.
- Taking time off work when my life started to fall apart.
- Going back to work and putting some boundaries around what I can and can’t do, workwise.
- Admitting I have depression, anxiety, PTSD, whatever else she wants to add – and taking the evil pills to address some of these things.
- Exploring group therapy.
- Seeing a “shrink” (ok, that didn’t turn out so well, but I gave it a go.)
- Telling my doctor about heinous shyt.
- Seeing a gynaecologist and dealing with some of my health issues.
Thinking about these things made me realise that I can do some things. I can make progress. One step at a time. Especially if I don’t think about it too much, just do it.
Here, my friends, is proof that tomorrow DOES come. 🙂