Old dogs and new tricks

For those of you who don’t know, I bought a new house on the weekend. Actually, it’s not that “new” (about 90 years old) but new for me, and I’ve had buyer’s agents doing most of the work, so I didn’t even buy it myself. Still, it’s mine now, and I’m excited!! I can’t wait to move!! 🙂

Of course, now I have to sell my place. I’m completely overwhelmed with things to do … for those who’ve bought and sold before you’ll know what I’m talking about. For those who haven’t, trust me, it’s tedious and crazy-making with everything that has to be done.

Anyway… long story short: my buyer’s agents sent me the BIGGEST bunch of flowers today. They are absolutely gorgeous, and I thought it was a very nice gesture on their part.


Unfortunately my mother doesn’t have a very high opinion of real estate agents. Granted, many agents in this part of the world are, well, so slick they give Teflon a run for its money. Still, I thought the flowers were a nice touch given the agents could have just cut and run.

Obviously she didn’t because she just laughed at me when I told her. She always says “oh good” when she’s laughing like this, but in a nasty, sarcastic, mocking way. In this case I took it to mean something like “You’re a sucker. They’re just leeches.”

I’ve been struggling to hold it together today – feeling so completely overwhelmed with everything I have to do. So, of course, when she laughed at me I just lost it. I can’t remember what I said, but it was something about her always being sarcastic and critical, and yes, real estate agents are real estate agents, but the flowers are still a nice gesture… then I said good-bye and hung up the phone.

Can you believe she’s meant to be the “supportive” and “non-abusive” parent here?

Now that I’ve got your blood boiling with more of her antics … here’s the old dog and new tricks part.

A little while later she sent me a text message that said:

“I love you very much but don’t be so bl00dy sensitive! Agents is agents! I’ll do whatever I can to help you through this. xx”

What the… ? Did she really say she loves me and that she’ll support me? I can’t believe it! I honestly think that’s about the second time in my life she’s told me that (the first being her last visit to my therapist).

I’m almost touched but I’m still furious with her. I guess she’s trying and I should give her credit for that, right?



9 thoughts on “Old dogs and new tricks

  1. First off, congrats on the new place! I knew you were looking, but didn’t realize you had actually found a new home. I wish you much happiness there.

    Regarding your mom. Sadly, no surprises there. Perhaps “she’s meant to be the “supportive” and “non-abusive” parent here” but you know the truth is that she’s simply not. =(

    (((hugs))) to you Kerro!

  2. Hi Kerro,

    Congratulations on the new home. I hope the best for you during this time.

    I have to agree with Bird. Your mother is not supportive and she is abusive. Emotional abuse is real abuse. Neglect is real abuse. She does it all the time. And when someone calls someone sensitive or too sensitive they are being emotionally abusive.

    I know it is hard wanting something from her that she has previously not given you. I think that you are doing some great healing work. And will find that your life will benefit from that in the short term and the long term.


  3. Congrats on the new house from me too! Sounds wonderful – and the flowers do look lovely. My thought about your Mother’s reaction is that she may indeed think of herself as supportive, she may even think she’s being supportive. Maybe she acutally is trying to be supportive – who knows? But, from my experience with my parents, I really believe that after a lifetime of being who they are they simply cannot be supportive. Certainly their wish to be supportive does not necessarily translate into actions.

  4. Hey Kerro, that is great news! Yippie new digs. Don’t sweat it, things will all come together. Sorry the mother thing is bitter sweet. But you are looking at more of the positive now I noticed? I good thing I think! Hang in and good luck…

  5. I think the flowers are a really nice touch. We bought a house and our agents didn’t send us shit.

  6. *sigh*

    I love you “but” — it’s the “but” that matters in that sentence, I’m afraid.

    Those are really nice flowers … they remind me of the flowers my last satisfied clients sent to me. But then, I’m the exception to the agent rule. 🙂

  7. Pingback: In which my faith is restored « Kerro’s Korner

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