Dreams

I had a couple of weird dreams last week. Perhaps it was the build up of unreleased emotional “stuff” over life’s twists and turns, or perhaps it was the preservative laden soft drink I consumed with dinner? Who knows?

These are the first clearly recollectable dreams I’ve had in awhile. Here they are:

1. Mum and I in the car, on the way to a therapy session. Mum driving, but going the wrong way or getting lost, so that we would never make it to therapy.

2. I went to therapy, only my T wasn’t there or wouldn’t see me. Most of the dream was about the distress that this induced.

Hmmmm….. I think this is fairly obvious given what’s been going on for me, but I know there are those who say all the characters in your dreams are representations of yourself. If that’s the case:

1. Who the hell is driving the car if I am in the passenger seat? Or is this code for my own resistance to therapy??

2. If I’m not there with me, then, umm…. emperor’s new clothes? Fear of not finding the “me” I’ve lost?

What the … ?

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8 thoughts on “Dreams

  1. My T is one of those people who likes to look at the characters in dreams as parts of ourselves . . .maybe in the first dream, your Mum represents the part of you that might be resistant and want to avoid “going there”? Just a thought. If it were my dream, that would be what it would mean to me. lol

  2. Hi Tamp, I think you could be right, although these dreams were such a reflection of what was happening in real life, it’s hard to know. I don’t discuss dreams with T – although perhaps I should. I certainly don’t want to tell her about the one in the mountains, which Google tells me is code for sex!!! LOL

  3. My T always says “what does the dream mean to you?” if I tell her about one. I don’t think it’s possible to assign blanket meanings to dreams – even if two people had a virtually identical dream, the meaning would be unique to the dreamer.

    If I’d had your first dream, I’d probably interpret it as my mum not considering my therapy important enough to make sure I got there on time (although IRL she doesn’t even know I have therapy lol)

    Your second one is one I had several times in the first couple of years of therapy – all kinds of obstacles would come up to prevent me getting there on time, or I’d get there and T wouldn’t be there, or she’d be there but too busy to see me, or I’d gone at the wrong time etc etc. For me it was a trust thing. I needed to know that she’d be there for me in both the physical sense of being present and “being there” in the sense of emotionally available, but it took me a very long time to develop the belief that she would be.

  4. Gosh HF, I think you hit the nail on the head with both of those interpretations, and particularly the second. The “abandonement-that-wasn’t” episode still looms very large for me. I’m still worried that T is going to throw me out or otherwise disappear – and not be present in the physical or emotional sense. I’m at a point of getting into some more deeply nasty stuff with T (for me anyway) and it’s scaring the cr@p out of me – both in the sense of having to reveal things I find deeply shameful, and in the sense that I worry she’ll lift the lid on another can of worms and then disappear.

    Thanks everyone for your posts.

  5. It feels very dangerous to uncover the crap in any case. But if the basic trust in another is not there, our unconscious will try and protect us as best it can. You might “logically” trust T and think she probably won’t run out on you, but actually believing it on a visceral level takes much longer and I wonder if that’s what your unconscious is wrestling with in your abandonment dreams.

    Freud reckoned that a dream was “the fulfilment of a wish”. I’m not sure if all dreams can be seen that way, but if you look at your dream from the other perspective – T abandoning you would a) prove you right in your belief that everyone eventually does and b) would mean you wouldn’t have to talk to her about this difficult and painful stuff.

  6. Hey Kerro! I haven’t been “around” much latey – so much I didn’t even realize you had a blog. Thanks for the link buddy – I have added you to my link list as well. Check out the new forum for the password for protected posts okay?

  7. Hi Kerro,

    One way of interpreting a dream is to imagine that each thing individually in a dream is you or an aspect of you and your life.

    However there are lots of differing ways to interpret a dream.

    Cars can represent your life. In the dream with the car your mother id driving, though you should be. That is a big feeling of being out of control and lost, thanks to her bad driving. It sounds like a parental attempt to take control of your life, your therapy, and your speaking about what you need to in order to heal. That is just one short ananlysis of the dream.

    A book on dreaming that really taught me a lot says that dreams are a way for our unconscious to resolve issues while sleeping that are a part of our conscious awareness. So dreamaing about therapy, control and taking care of your own life can be seen as attempts at your unconscious mind to help you resolve the issues you have during your waking time.

    I agree as well that the real interpretation is the one that you feel inside yourself is the right one.

    Good and healing thoughts to you.

    Kate

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